WEDDING TIPS

Wedding Planning with your Fiance 

 

When it's just the two of you, dating, life can be grand. It is truly the most self absorbed period of your relationship when there are no more worries than what movie to see or where to eat dinner. You can talk for hours about everything under the sun and you can fantasize about your future life together.And then you get engaged. After the "hour of bliss" of being newly engaged, reality gives most of us a big smackdown. 

Without realizing it, the ring symbolizes the beginning your public relationship. Your relationship is no longer about just the two of you. When you get engaged, you are becoming a son or daughter in law, a brother or sister in law, and you are joining a new family. Imagine being adopted at age 25 or 30 and this is what it's like to get married. You are entering into a new emotional forcefield, a new family you did not grow up with and do not share a history with. Even if you've known your fiance(e) for years, there is nothing quite like "til death do us part" to change the way others will relate to you or to change how you view or relate to others. All the sudden your boyfriends mom is going to become your mother-in-law. If you want children, you will be making her into a grandmother and she will be your childrens grandmother, no matter how much you love or hate her. 

WHAT IS YOUR IDEAL WEDDING?

Although there are hundreds of decisions in planning a wedding, there is a shorter list of key ones that reflect your cherished hopes for your wedding. We have developed a worksheet  to help you clarify your expectations for six key areas of your wedding: location, size, season, ceremony, wedding party, and who will pay. All of these decisions affect one another, and there will be challenges in implementing them as a package. Being clear on what you prefer, what you feel you must have, and where you can bend, will help you avoid future conflict. 

There is lots of advice available to you about the timing and logistics for deciding these matters. Our interest is on how you can surface your hopes and ideals, so that you can understand each other better and be a good working team as you begin your discussions with your families and other stakeholders in you wedding.